Elizabeth
Let's start with the head of the household ... yep, that's me! Mammy Greysie, "Lizza" to Daddy Greysie or "Elizabeth" to all other grown ups. I'm a person of many contradictions. I'm chilled about most things, however I have a list of "pet hates" as long as your arm! In fact there are so many things which annoy me and so many things I have an opinion on that I've become a bit of a crusader. My crusading topics range from the petty to the very important, with much scope for whimsy, tom-foolery, angst and outright rage in between.
I've been told I'm knowledgeable about things. I like to learn, I read, I google and I can't remember what life was like before the internet. I briefly recall visiting a place called a "library" - whatever the dickens that is!
This is what this blog is about. It isn't confined to parenting or domestic drudgery ... I promise there will be plenty of important things to discuss along the way! x
"Elizabeth spends most of her time sitting in the lounge attached to a laptop. She'll say she's doing either very important writing or vital crusading, but everybody else in the family knows she's on Facebook."
Chrissy
My no.2 and partner in crime. Also known as Daddy Greysie, Chrissy is a pretty average sort of chap who enjoys general Great British manly pursuits such as golf and beer and good food and rock music. You will see from his photo that he's a man of little hair. This wasn't always the case as I've seen much evidence that he once had long flowing locks which were grown in the late 1980s in order to emulate his rock heroes.
Chrissy is an easy going chap. He likes a spot of DIY, he enjoys "resting his eyes" (when he gets a chance), he's a fun dad and he's a bit of a clever clogs to boot. Mind, only in the realm of bridge-building and maths type stuff - don't ask him who won the Battle of Britain or who wrote Great Expectations or his head will explode.
I'm thankful he silently suffers my escapades with only the odd, "Elizabeth, think about what you're doing... " and a questioning raise of the eyebrow. I'm thankful he brings home the bacon so I can stay home to care for the children and I'm thankful for the lovely dinners he cooks. He's an all-round top bloke, a diamond in the rough and most importantly he makes me laugh.
If he doesn't stop complaining about having to watch Game of Thrones however, I shall divorce him.
Chrissy can usually be found avoiding the children's loudness by skulking off to the loft room to research gadgets we don't need or tinkering with something that wasn't broken until he tinkered with it.
Charlie
The eldest of the three little Greysies is our Snort, the Snorter, Captain Snort, Snortimus Maximus, Mr. Snortley of Snortimer Primary, or just "Charlie" to his friends. He's just started to dislike the nickname he's had since he was baby (assigned for his snuffly newborn grunt as opposed to a cocaine addiction), so tread very carefully if ever you want to use it!
Charlie (aged six and a half) and Mammy Greysie "get" each other. I was originally a Johnson, and the Snort is a Johnson through and through. He's a mini-Elizabeth and a mini-Granddad. What does this mean? Well the top and bottom of it is he's a laid-back little fella (some would say bone-idle lazy) who likes his comforts, likes good food and is rubbish at anything which requires a bat, ball or balance.
Young Snort is the gentlest and kindest of souls who is a real home-bird. He's the golden boy with Grandma and he tells Mammy that she's beautiful. He's just an all round canny little guy who doesn't have a bad bone in his body. I don't understand why he likes to watch people playing computer games on YouTube and I understand even less why he likes to watch people opening kinder eggs on YouTube, but his appreciation of good films and cracking show-tunes means he's already on the way to knowing "what's what" in life!
Charlie can usually be found dressed as the Tin Man with an x-box controller in one hand and a pizza in the other. Ask him to do anything and he'll yawn and say, "I'm far too tired."
Henry
Meet the Monster! Well many families of five have that troublesome middle child and little Hen, Hendrix or the lovely named "Henry" certainly embodies the stereotype. There was a time when my stubborn one would only answer to the name "Batman" (and god help you if you dared use his actual name), but thankfully that stage has passed.
Henry (aged almost four) is a Grey through and through and the opposite of his big brother. Charlie is calm, easy-going and very easily coerced while this little guy is a bundle of fiery energy who has the iron will and determination of a lion!
Unusual to the rest of the Greysies, Henry exudes cool. He looks good in anything he wears and he struts along in shades and wellies, with a toy gun or screwdriver in his hand. Henry is a conundrum. He can seem like the funniest child on the planet one second, then he can be as infuriating as hell the next. Ask him to do something once and you'll probably have to ask another ten times, but that's him and we love him and we adapt what we do to accommodate his particular brand of Greysie ways!
Henry can usually be found dressed up as a super-hero, pirate, ghost or chimney sweep. He has an insatiable curiosity for disembodying action figures, destroying Lego and losing Playmobil hats.
Mathilde
Last of all is my funny little squishy-faced Biffa, named by Daddy for Biffa Bacon, an ample-cheeked character from The Viz comic. In real life I'm proud of her very elegant name, "Mathilde Violet", a moniker I'd planned to use with both her brothers and one which has the best name meaning in the entire world - "mighty battle maiden". Seriously, how cool is that?
Biffa (or "the Biffster" or "Biff-Stix") is a firm favourite with all the men in the family, especially Daddy Greysie for whom she can't put a foot wrong. This little lady is a force to be reckoned with and she's definitely the boss of the three little Greysie people. One time she had a handful of each brother's hair in each hand, pulling furiously, but most of the time she's full of sloppy, snotty, hugs and kisses.
The littlest Greysie (aged one and a half) started out life as my reward. Finally I would get to buy dresses! Yay!!! But 18 months on and the world of little girls is still alien to me. I hated the pink, I tried to avoid the glittery tat marketed to parents of girls and I noticed that whilst "boy toys" did cool stuff like fired missiles and blew up bad guys, "girl toys" could only be brushed. So I stayed away from the sparkle and I ended up with ... a little girl who loves dresses, shoes, handbags, princesses and all things pink. That will teach me! :)
Mathilde is usually clip-clopping around the house in mammy's shoes, pushing a pram occupied by a Darth Vader figure and holding a handbag full of important things like lollipops.
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